Love the Butterfly Heart Flutters

I was being led to be still and needed space to do that before my day of appointments began.  After I dropped my daughter off at school, I decided to go to JMU Arboretum to meditate.  Once I got there, I was the only car on the lot and it felt like it had been reserved especially for me on this day at this appointed time.  I began to walk down the path and cross the pond. At the edge of the pond was one duck with her one duckling.  I wondered why she only had one duckling and why there were no other ducks on the pond which I thought was odd.

As I continued on the path where fresh pine bark had been laid, I heard birds chirping joyfully.  Then a sweet aroma captured my senses.  I found myself breathing in deeper and deeper wanting more of this sweet, pleasing aroma.  I did not see any blossoms and could not figure out where the smell was coming from.  Then discretely mingled with other greenery, I saw it!  It was honeysuckle.  Oh yes, honeysuckle!

I continued to walk along the path listening to the quietness with background melodies of the birds chirping.  Then I came upon azaleas that were bursting with blooms of a deep, passionate lavender that gave me a calming peace and knowing of feeling near to the Holy Spirit.  My heart had butterfly flutters like you get when you know for the first time you are in love .  I got emotional with tears in my eyes and goose bumps all over my body.

How would the Holy Spirit use this azalea bush bloom to speak to me?  What would it say and want me to know?  I know it is something important because my heart was melting as I stared and reflected on the beauty of the bloom.  I picked off one of the blooms and held it in my hand hoping that it would speak to me.  It also had five petals with three that were on top that I instantly thought of the Trinity of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  The two petals at the bottom spoke of my daughter and I.  What does that mean?

I sat on the park bench and just kept staring at the petal praying that it would speak to me.  On the one top petal that represents the Father were mingled yellow-green markings on it.  As I sat quietly, the wind was blowing softly rustling the leaves with a sound similar to flowing water.

As I was sitting on the park bench, I heard footsteps behind me and as I turned it was a friend that I had not seen in a long time that noticed I was there.  He approached me and said that he noticed I was there meditating and he wanted to give me something to put on my desk and handed me a small potted plant called a creeping sedum.  He told me that it gets a beautiful pink bloom on it and that he hoped it would bring me joy.

What are the synchronistic possibilities of that happening?  What does that mean?  I begin to be amazed at how mysteriously God works and reveals Himself with through His creation and others.  God certainly was present with me in all of my coming and goings of this day so far.

Then I reflected and wondered that maybe I am like the duck that feels all alone with one duckling?  Even though I am on the path that I know God has divinely orchestrated, the path can often feel lonely.  On the path, God let me smell his sweet honeysuckle aroma revealing to me that He is close with me.  When I feel like there is so much darkness around me, He shows me his bursting beauty through azalea blossoms that are lavender that represents Spirit that is dotted with yellow-green patterns that show energy and new growth that is being birthed from the Father.  I noticed that the azalea bush is called bloom-a-thon lavender.  Bloom-a-thon?  Maybe running a race at a steady pace with patience and endurance for the long haul that just keeps blooming and blooming?  Then an old friend synchronistically appeared on the same path that would hand me a creeping sedum to bring me joy!  I sat there emotional again in awe of how God was showing His Glory and mystery.

As I began to leave, I come upon a sapling tree with a baby blue jay resting on the limb that is apparently just learning to fly.  God speaks to me and says that He too is equipping me to fly just like the blue jay in the tree.  Once I learn to fly being navigated by the Holy Spirit, I too will be like the azalea bloom bursting of inner beauty and light ministering to others with great love, patience, and endurance for the long haul planting seeds for more blossoms to come forth.  As I get to the pond, ironically it is full of ducks and ducklings where God reminds me that I am not alone.  Just as He brought a friend to me when I least expected, He too will surround me with others that will come along to nourish my heart, mind, body and soul.  He affirmed that I am never alone and He has given me exactly what I need right when I need it. 

God, thank you for showing your presence all around me this morning reminding me that when I am still, you will show up in amazing and profound ways.  I am so thankful that I acknowledged the Sarah Young devotional from Jesus Calling that said to "Be still in My Presence, inviting Me to control your thoughts. Let My Light soak into your mind and heart, until you are aglow with My very Being. This is the most effective way to receive My Peace."  Not only did You give me peace, you gave me affirmation that everything that is happening is in your control and you are in the middle of all of it beyond my understanding and comprehension.  I just need to pay attention!  Thank you God for giving my heart butterfly flutters of your love today! 

P.S. - I later looked up the characteristics of the creeping sedum.  It said that it thrives on neglect.  It is a tough-as-nails plant with colorful flowers that can even survive and bounce back when it is stepped on.   It is drought-tolerant that blooms nearly all season and will grow where other plants can't live. They can even grow out of rocky ground or stone walls.  Profound symbolism in my own personal story.  God is Almighty!

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

Holy Land Final Days & Affirmation to Let My Life Speak

The last three days of my Palestine/Israel trip were the most powerful experiences and affirmations from the Holy Spirit.  It began once I arrived in Nazareth and visited the site of Mary's Well and Church of the Annunciation where Mary was visited by the angel to let her know that she was favored by God and would give birth to a son named Jesus, our Lord and Savior.  I resonated with Mary because I know too that I have been called for a specific reason and purpose.  I am being called into ministry to serve others and save souls.  Just as I am sure Mary felt scared, overwhelmed and asking the question of how God could possibly use her, I too have had the same questions and resisted the calling.  God has been patient and graceful through this process with me by continuing to give me outward signs, words of affirmations from others and a desire upon my heart that won't go away.  I can't even ignore it because of its intensity.

Our hotel room was along the Sea of Galilee and every free opportunity I had I would have my feet in the water.  This evening was different and I felt called to go sit in the water and meditate in the water.  I sat in waist deep water for probably 30 to 40 minutes.  It was an amazing feeling that I have never experienced before.  I have never meditated in a body of water much less the Sea of Galilee.  As I sat there feeling the water hit up against me nudging my body I heard God say,

"You are the buoy and I am the living water that anchors you.  No matter what storms, winds, or intense heat surround you, I will sustain you and not let you sink.  Just as a buoy is free floating so too will you be free floating going along with the waves or my nudges of where I want you to go."

As I sat there, I had an amazing peace within me knowing that I am acknowledging and accepting my calling.  I no longer feel scared but now ready to take the next step.

Little did I know the following day that when we started out that I would rededicate my baptism at the Baptismal Site on the Jordan River.  But then again, everything that I had experienced up to this point I know led to this life changing and conformational moment.

On our last day along the Sea of Galilee at our final retreat God spoke to me with concrete affirmation through two stones.  The first stone was triangular in shape with one side all smooth that resembled me in the past that looked all put together.  However, when I turned the stone over, it was dirty, rough, many imperfections, resembled pain, hurt, trauma, sin and unresolved issues.  What I noticed about this stone was that it was in the shape of a triangle representing the trinity of the, Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  So through all of my past circumstances and filth, God was there with me right where I was the entire time even though I may not have known or felt His presence.  The second stone resembled new.  It was the new me or the new me that I wanted to achieve.  It was almost a perfect heart on both sides that was smooth and beautiful.  It did not matter which side you flipped it to they both looked the same.  That is what I want for myself.  I want to be smooth, pure and in the image of Christ no matter what side you flip me on.


I remember as I was sitting with my feet in the Sea of Galilee, I had three minnows that were swimming in and around my toes playing.  It was actually tickling my feet to the point that I began to laugh outwardly.  I was joyful and thought that I too can now be joyful about this calling instead of mourning it like I have been for the past three years.  I can actually say that I am joyful for this calling that God has placed upon my heart.  I will embrace this calling and the unknown instead of resisting it.  I will accept this calling and walk it out to fruition leaving all doubts behind me.  This vision is greater than me and I will abandon my narrow minded thinking of selfish desires that are impermanent.  I will rely solely on spirit to guide me to release all flesh and worldly distractions.  No longer do I have to do this alone, but I will embrace partnerships and others that God puts beside me to bring this vision to fruition.  It is about a community of love and not self seeking recognition.  It is about the unseen opportunities that my limited eye sight can't recognize.  It is about being open to the spirit's leading and I'm finished with my preconceived plans.  It's about letting my life speak through Jesus Christ so that all can see His light, truths, promises and eternal glory of where heaven meets earth.

Thank you God for using the Holy Land trip that would transform me to hear, see, feel and receive this gift from you.  The gift I have received must be shared and expressed with others to glorify your Holy Name.  Amen!

Come Now I Have Called You

Another busy day loading up our luggage, leaving Nazareth and traveling to Tiberias.  We visited ancient Sepphoris, visited Kibbutz Lavi and the walked up the cliff of Arbel for a breathtaking view of the Sea of Galilee.  We enjoyed a peaceful sail across the Galilee then ended up at our hotel that actually overlooks the Galilee.  As soon as I got my luggage to my room, I took off to explore the shore of the Galilee and to put my feet in the water.

So here I am sitting along the rocky shore of the Galilee with my pant legs rolled up and my feet in the water.  I am running my hands through the stones and small shells.  I am collecting my favorite ones based on size, shape and color.  I collected an entire handful and wasn't sure what I was going to put them in because I would like to take them home with me.  In my backpack I found a small zip lock bag that my dental flossers are in.  I dumped them out in the bottom of my backpack and placed my collection in the bag. 

As I sit here and watch the sun go down across the water, the waves are gently rippling in and out in abstract patterns.  As the waves hit the shore, it makes a swishing sound that is so peaceful.  This reminds me of the story of Jesus and his disciples going across the Galilee.  When Jesus was napping, a storm came upon them.  The disciples scared, awakened Jesus frantically stating that the boat was going to sink,  In his calm and peaceful demeanor, he asked them if they had no faith.  Then the storm, wind and waves calmed down.  The disciples were amazed at what Jesus had just done.

As I stare at my feet in the water, I imagine myself in the boat in the middle of my life storm.  The water on my feet reminds me of Jesus' living water that is washing over me.  As he is washing over me, he is tossing and tumbling me about to smooth the rough edges just like the stone on the shore that I found.  He is pushing me to come out of my comfort zone and move into the new thing that he has prepared and divinely orchestrated for me like the empty snail shells I found on the shore.  I have to come out of my shell that has for so long been a safe haven for me.

I hear Jesus saying stop resisting this tossing and tumbling.  Let me have my way with you.  Come out of your shell so that you can realize your full potential and what I have planned for you.  Jesus is saying it is time!  You have been on the boat long enough.  It is time for you to look forward and step out of the boat onto the water looking at me and only me.  He says to me, "show me your faith and I will not let you sink.  I have been on this journey through the storms, during the tossing and tumbling, even at your comfortable hiding place and now with you ready to take those next steps.  I am with you!"

Then I composed this poem titled:

Come Now I Have Called You

Through the storms

You tossed and tumbled me

Like stones with many edges,

shapes and colors.

 

You pushed me out of my comfort zone

Encouraging me to leave my safe haven.

All along you have been with me

Pouring your living water over me.

 

Now you give me peace and say

Get out of the boat

Come, follow and realize your full potential.

I have patiently been waiting.

 

Come, Come now!





Am I Alive?

I awoke  early this morning after a short night.  I have a personal emotional burden that I am carrying that was escalated last night.  I cried, felt sick, and questioned God how much more suffering I must endure.  When will the pain stop?

So here I am on the rooftop at 6:15 am in Nazareth overlooking the city as the sun comes up.  I hear birds chirping, roosters crowing and a gentle breeze is blowing around me.  Three crows have landed on the railing that is sitting patiently and occasionally cawing.  God do they have a message for me?  I also hear a baby calf mooing.  The roosters have already crowed 30 times as I write this.  This morning is already alive and busy.

Am I alive?  I know this sounds like a silly question, but what does it mean to be alive?  Do I just go through the motions of the day without plan and order seeking out my own agenda, desires and plans?  Or do I stop resisting the calling and walk courageously where I know God is leading me?  It seems like a lonely path, but this nudging won't go away that creates an internal conflict between flesh and spirit.  It is at this place where my body felt sense is anxious and sick inside.  What would it look like for me to forego my flesh desires and how do I even accomplish that?  I have been struggling now for almost three years with this constant pain that won't go away.  Everyday there are memories and reminders that triggers this pain.  How does one live by not acknowledging their feelings, emotions and desires that God gave us?  This pain is a thorn in my side that keeps piercing already deeply infected wounds.  What is God trying to reveal to me in this pain?  How or when will the thorn be pulled out? I know even then that my wound will be a scar there for the rest of my life but when will God deliver me from this ever present pain?

In this pain, I have realized that psychologically I have been oppressed, dehumanized and made to feel unworthy.  As I have been here in Palestine/Israel, this is exactly how the Palestinians have been treated.  This is a form of violence which is often unspoken and unrecognized.  Nevertheless, it is a form of violence when a person is made to feel inadequate, unworthy and shunned.  Maybe this is the purpose for my thorn in my side?  I have been able to connect and relate to the Palestinian people with deep empathy and compassion.  Perhaps our similar emotional turmoil is what connects and binds our hearts and souls.  Perhaps if I didn't have this thorn in my side, I may be just another tourist looking at the sites.  Perhaps this is what God is revealing to me.  Maybe He is making me aware of my own pain that I feel trapped just like the Palestinians so that I can become alive through my pain.  It is at this place of being alive and aware of my pain that I can see into the eyes of others suffering and pain.  Their pain is my pain that is becoming alive within me creating compassion and love that is too great to ignore these feelings and emotions.  Now I must do something to be a voice for the oppressed, sick and hurting people.  God is revealing to me that this is what it truly means to be alive.  To be alive you have experienced much pain, suffering and sorrow.  To be alive you experience relationships, memories and failures.  To be alive you experience joy, hope and love.  But to be fully alive in Christ you use all of the emotions and experiences by putting your faith into action to selflessly serve those in need and suffering.  This is greater than me and my suffering.  This is about living alive by living out my calling to serve, heal and transform lives in the name of the Son, Jesus Christ, whom also suffered for what he did not deserve.  Because He is able and I am all things in Him, I too am able by His body and blood that was shed for me.  Thank you Jesus for this unmerited gift of your love and mercy upon me.  Because you can love, I too can love all including the oppressor and enemy. 

Just as Mary said, "I am the Lord's servant, may it be to me as you have said."  (Luke 1:38)

In Silence Seek Wisdom to Speak Wisely

My group's schedule has been so busy beginning with early mornings and late evenings so that is why I have not had an opportunity to give an update on the daily activities in Jerusalem.  Yesterday was day 16.  We loaded up our luggage once again and drove to Ramallah.  We went to the Quaker Friends Meeting House where we met an inspirational Palestinian woman and author, Jean Zaru.  Her insights were remarkable and she stated that in Judaism, Islam and Christianity all believe that human beings are created in the image of God.  She said that "if it is believed that I am a child of God that empowers me, then I must confess and work to let everyone know that they too are a child of God."  She further explained that if she truly believes this that it is not acceptable to use any form of violence against children of God. 

She did say that we do need to find a way to resist the injustice by a positive alternative method.  Often times our psychological responses to injustices are maladaptive  and unproductive by such means as withdrawing, accommodating or manipulating.  Withdrawing deprives oneself and their community from transformation.  Accommodating is a way of getting ones needs met but again it doesn't create change.  Manipulating is self seeking for individual interest for power that belittles others and does not create change.

She suggested an alternative way to resist in a nonviolent way.  Her approach is to use faith, psychology and nonviolent resistance that strategically balances power.  There must be a balance of our structures for human rights, dignity and equality for everyone.  Transformation takes place when one stands up, speaks and reacts with non-resistance. 

Zura continued to say that silence is a form of violence and sin because it allows injustices of violence and oppression to continue to happen.  She stated that we need to get involved with the passion of Christ to give a voice to those who are oppressed.

Me being here and a witness to the stories of fear, injustices, oppression and an unbalance of power between people has made me realize that I must go home and share the narratives.  I must give them a voice and share truths of what the media does not convey to the US. 

As I prepare myself to be the voice back home, I must be still and sit in silence with God to give me the insight, wisdom and words of what He wants me to convey.  It reminds me of the Quaker's prayer that says:

Silence
is a natural demand
born of a need for God,
felt by young and old,
in all the world's religions.

In silence we may worship together,
sharing our search for life,
sharing our quest for peace,
sharing God's gift of love.

My reflection is that we need to learn how we can live together by seeking to understand each other by honoring each others life stories, background and circumstance.  Once we understand, then we can be understood which can create peace.  Once we have peace within ourselves, we release God's gift of a deep well of love that can be shared with all.  We become God's light, truth and promises.  He is the way to create unity and have peace here on earth!

Connections in Christ

What touched me the most today was our visit to the Palestinian Village, At Tuwani.  It was humbling, but also eye opening to the extent of the violence and oppression that Palestinians are experiencing from the Israeli occupation.  Their homes were built in the desert along the hillside that were incomplete and in poor condition.  Within the past year, they just received electricity and they have been living there since the early 90's.  They experienced the Israeli's poisoning their livestock.  Now a new Israeli settlement is being built near their village and the military is telling them where they can and cannot graze their livestock. 

The people of At Tuwani were so kind and hospitable to us.  We sat with them and had tea and bread that they prepared for us.  I met one barefooted little girl that pulled on my heart strings.  She saw in my book bag that I had shiny lip gloss.  She pointed to it and her lips so I knew what she wanted.  I gave it to her and she knew exactly what to do with it.  I made her day and she also made my day with her loving hug!

This village had a peace making team there helping the Palestinians to have a voice by documenting their experiences with photos and videos.  They have documented the poisoning of their livestock, cutting down of their olive trees, moving fences closer in on their village as well as abuse and arrests of their children. 

While we were there, we shopped in their little village shop of handmade things made by the women.  It felt so good to be there to hear their story, see how they are being forced to live, to support them financially in their shop, and hopefully giving them a voice by educating ourselves to share with others and especially our US leaders of the injustice that is taking place. 

Another example of injustice and persecution was in Hebron.  The Palestinian Christians there are also experiencing abduction of their kids with arrests, not allowing access to their home because it fronts on Shuhada Road that the Palestinians are not allowed to walk on.  If they do, they are arrested.  So from the roof top of the Christian Peacemaking Team's office, they showed us how these families have to go down an alley way and climb ladders to get into their homes.

Susan, with the Christian Peacemaker Team that led us around became an instant friend.  Our souls connected in the name and service of our Lord Jesus Christ.  I am looking forward to staying in contact with my new friend and sister in Christ.  She is from the Philippians and had a family that she has been away from for nearly a year fulfilling her calling to serve the Lord.  I admire her faith, service and love for the Lord and the Palestinian people.  It was truly beautiful meeting her and the Palestinian families today.

Stop the Wall

Our first stop this morning was at Wi'am where we met the Executive Director, Zoughbi Zoughbi at Palestinian Conflict Resolution Center.  He discussed their programs of Ministry and Reconciliation for resolving conflict working with men, women and children.  They use numerous mediums of training, panel discussions, seminars, camps, theatre, art and drama.  He said that 80% of the children have been traumatized. 

They also work on women empowerment and advocacy programs.  Their teaching and training focuses on not dwelling on victimhood in which they do not blame or judge anyone.  He said that those thoughts and feelings are toxic to oneself.  He said it is a collective responsibility of all involved .  Furthermore, he said that "peace is a holistic approach".

I personally could resonate with his insight and wisdom that there needs to be responsibility from all involved by seeking to understand each others narrative.  This is exactly what I believe and how I feel a shift can occur for peace and reconciliation.

Next we visited Bethlehem Bible College and had an amazing lecture by Reverend Alex Awad who is from the US and is the Dean of Student.  His lecture was about Christian Zionism with the use of visual aids and his personal story that brought a clearer understanding to me about the history of events of how we are at this place today.  It was excellent!

The rest of the afternoon we met with Stop the Wall and Mennonite Central Committee advocate.  We traveled around the outside of the walls and were given personal stories of how the wall has affected Palestinians.  Can you imagine having an authority coming to your home and taking it away from you with no compensation and being displaced from your own land?  Can you imagine needing to get a permit in order to have family come visit you and visits have to be at certain times?  Can you imagine being told when and how many times you can go to your farm land to work it?  Can you imagine being told when and if you can go to your worship service?

This is exactly the oppression that the Palestinians are experiencing.  They are being controlled and persecuted by the Israeli Occupation.  I am still as I write this trying to articulate my thoughts and emotions about this strangulation on the Palestinians.  It is heartbreaking from so many realms.  At one part of the wall today, we found an empty tear gas canister with the initials of CTS on it that is produced in Pennsylvania and sold by the US.  A quote that I saw on the wall today was "A country is not only what it does it is also what it tolerates."  (Kurt Tucholsky, 1933).  How can the US and other countries stand by and watch this form of violence and injustice take place?  When I return, I am going to write letters to my congressmen and the President and share with them my personal observations and experiences! In the meantime, pray for peace, seek justice and love mercifully!

A Day of Rest!

I awoke this morning here in Jerusalem an hour later than normal because it was Sunday.  After our packed full schedule this past week of going nonstop with learning, sightseeing, and cultural experiences I really appreciated the extra hour of sleep and the relaxed day.

We all shared in a special worship service at The Evangelical Lutheran Christmas Church here in Bethlehem.  What made it so special is that our friend, Dr. Reverend Mitri Raheb that we met earlier in the week is the pastor.  The worship service was in Arabic with an English translation bulletin so that we could worship together.  I loved how the service was in both languages and appreciated how welcomed and at home they made us feel.  Our very own, Dorothy Jean Weaver, was asked to participate in the worship service by reading from Ephesians 4:14-21.  Also in attendance for this service were groups from Norway and Finland.  After the service we were invited to join the congregation for fellowship and coffee in the parish hall. 

After worship service we were on our own with free time.  Some went out for lunch, some went shopping, while others reflected, meditated, read or rested.  We are now refreshed and ready for the activities before us this week anticipating what God will reveal to us in our continued journey together as fellow travelers!

He is the Beginning & the End: I Must Trust & Believe!

Early this morning we went to the Dome of the Rock and viewed the Holy Land that creates so much conflict and tension between the Jews, Muslims & Christians.  I was in awe of this place but with mixed feelings and emotions.  This is the holy ground where there should be so much honor and reverence for others but it has actually created division among people. 

Next we went to the Western Wall and since it was Thursday, there were many bar mitzvah celebrations taking place.  It was crowded at the Wall, but we did make our way to it to say prayers with men on the larger side and the women on the other side.  Around this area we were able to stand on the Southern Steps where Jesus would have spent much time preaching and teaching.  From the Southern Steps you could look up and see the Mount of Olives.  We walked on actual streets below the current grade and visualized where stores would have been along the streets.  These excavations were from the Herodian period.  We were told that some of the massive stones could weigh as much as two and a half tons.  It was hard for me to conceptualize during that period how much labor it would take to place those stones with out modern technology.  From there we went to the Israel museum where we were able to see the Dead Sea Scrolls.  What was also helpful was a model of the City of Jerusalem with surrounding tribes in relation to the Temple. 

My favorite visit of he day was at St. Peters Cathedral in Gallicantu.  Under the cathedral was a prisoners cave where Jesus probably spent one night before his crucifixion.  The original steps of where Jesus would have been led from are still there, but protected from tourists walking on them because people were chipping off pieces from the stone steps as souvenirs.  I reflected on the reading of Psalm 88 thinking of Jesus in the dark prison pit and how lonely and weak he must have felt.  He was afflicted by others and knew that he was nearing his death.  This scripture deeply pierced my soul because I too have felt this place with in my inner depths.  As I am hearing God calling me into ministry it is challenging me creating conflict between spirit and flesh were I often feel alone, weak and grieving losses.

The sprcific scriptures that spoke to me were:  Psalm 88:8-9 & Psalm 88:18.  "You have taken from me my closest friends and made me repulsive to them.  I am confined and cannot escape; my eyes are dim with grief."  Psalm 88:18 "You have taken my companions and loved ones from me; the darkness is my closest friend."

I sat outside the cathedral and meditated in the garden by the steps that Jesus would have walked down.  I meditated on the scripture reading from Matthew 26:75 "Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken.  Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.  And he went outside and wept bitterly."

I too began to weep because I could personally relate to Peter where I have often questioned and doubted my faith and have failed in my personal life.  What I heard during this time of meditation from God was that "I am with you and have always been with you.  In all of this, I am strengthening your faith.  I am moving in your midst even though you can't see or understand what I am doing.  I see your heart and count your tears.  Trust and believe in my plan."

I was thankful for these words and Peter's testimony that he too, Jesus' best friend, also struggled with his faith and shortcomings.  While I was there sitting in meditation, guess what I heard?  I heard a rooster crow!  It crowed 10 times during that duration.  Yes 10 times.  He is the beginning and the end.  I must trust and believe! 

Jesus is Our Example for Peace

This morning we drove north from Bethlehem to Jaffa and visited the old city along the Mediterranean.  This city was quaint with impressive stone construction.  We visited the House of Simon, the tanner, where he received his vision in which he was commanded to eat animals regarded as unclean in Jewish tradition.  Peter heard God's voice to preach Christianity to Jews and pagans alike. 

We then met with Pastor David Lazrus in Jaffa of Beit Immanuel that is a congregation of Messianic Jews that believe in Jesus (Yeshua) that practices their Jewish faith.  Pastor Lazrus was a student at Eastern Mennonite Seminary over 30 years ago.  There are currently 150 Hebrew speaking congregations over Israel. 

After our lunch in the courtyard, we then continued to Jerusalem to Sabeel Ecumenical Liberation Theology Center where I fell in love with their work!  We met the Director and Reverend Naim Ateek regarding Palestinian Theology.  Naim Ateek is also an author and his most recent book is "A Palestinian Christian Cry for Reconciliation" which I got him to sign for me.  I was so inspired and invigorated by their work and programs because it is an ecumenical center started by Palestinians that reflect on what God tells them of how to live under occupation of Israel, considering how to respond, and how to react in a peaceful and nonviolent way.  Naim said that we have an example to follow because Jesus also lived under the occupation every day.  He suggested that conflict arises from different interpretations of the Bible and the solution to conflict is done by grace by humans and the influence of international law.  With God at the center with an inclusive nature of our faith and respect for others, we can achieve peace and justice.

Naim expressed his disappointment in the United States, it's political leaders and church leaders.  He is disappointed that they will not take a stand and speak out.  He said they offer their sympathies, but will not speak up.  He stated that the only hope is God and he is beginning to sense a movement that is not from the church but from God.

Their programs include working with women of all faiths, young adults, clergy of all churches, interfaith with Muslim community to create a greater understanding of respecting religions and accepting each other, and Partners with Jewish Voices for Peace.

I left there so inspired and invigorated by the work at Sabeel with Naim Ateek's leadership.  It is this type of center that builds relationships that creates trust and where positive dialogues can take place to create peace, justice, reconciliation and unity.  This is the example and pathway that Jesus Christ walked and lived by for us to follow.  It begins with one person with an open heart and mind allowing God to lead the process then putting our faith into action by speaking up and supporting programs for peace and nonviolence.  We need to focus on loving our neighbors, creating unity and ending injustices.  God says in Matthew 5:9, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.  May God bless all the beautiful work and programs that I am witnessing too!

Jesus Is Alive & Revealing His Grace, Love & Hope in the Holy Land!

Our morning began with a visit to the Dheishes Refugee Camp where Palestinians have been living since 1948.  It is called a refugee camp but in actuality they have been displaced because this is their homeland.  We met the Director, Rajrodeh, and he explained that there are currently 13,000 inhabitants from 50 villages in an area of less than 1/3 mile.  There are more than 6,000 children there under the age of 18.  Their unemployment rate is 70%.  We got to tour the refugee camp that is incomplete, crowded, and loitered with trash everywhere.  My favorite part was visiting their school of children around the ages of 4 to 5.  I played with them on their playground and played patty cake with them.  As I interacted with them, I thought how joyful and carefree they were in this environment having faith like children that God talks about.  The children revealed to me that I need to be more like a child running, playing and being carefree before my Heavenly Father with no worries and childlike faith.  As we left the school, we walked down a busy street in the refugee camp that was full of hustling people and big UN trucks that was delivering their rations of rice and flour.  The Director, Rajrodeh, told us that the Palestinian people want one state and that is answer with every Jew, Muslim & Christian living with and among each other. What is frustrating to them is that the UN has passed 14 resolutions, but they are not following or enforcing them at all. 

Next we visited an arts center established by the Lutheran Church for the Palestinian people.  They moved into their beautiful new facility in 2011 and just became an accredited university for the arts.  Their mission is to empower the Palestinians by teaching them their heritage art skills of mosaics, glass, jewelry, ceramics and now media production for personal documentaries.  This university was inspiring of how they were changing the lives of these young adults.

We then traveled to Beit Shaour to Hope School that is for disadvantaged children grades 7 - 12.  This is an ecumenical Christian school that is operating on a lot of faith and hope.  Some months they don't have enough money left over after expenses to pay their teachers.  The school is  worn and simple but you can feel the love that these kids are receiving with an education that would not otherwise be possible.  To raise money for their school they had three flocks of chickens that they raised to sell the eggs.  They are now down to one flock and the Israeli's will not let them purchase a rooster so that they can continue to have a productive flock.

As I reflect on all three of these places that I have been at today, I see in their faces loving, passionate people with amazing dreams, faith and resiliency that can still in spite of their circumstances have dreams and hope.  I am inspired by the directors, the principal of Hope School that does not take a salary but is a volunteer that also works as an independent lawyer, as well as the teachers who may or may not get paid at the end of the month.  These are people who are committed to a mission of making a difference and improving the lives of others even though they are not being paid their earned wages.  That is the work and love of Jesus Christ that has been put into action!  I am in awe at how visible God is here in this place, the Holy Land.  Thank you God for revealing yourself to me in countless ways already in my five days of being here.  Amen and continued blessings on these people who are making a difference and their programs!

Today's Events & A Conversation with a Palestinian Shop Keeper

Today was an amazing day.  We went to the Bascilica and Grotto (cave) of the Nativity where Jesus Christ was born.  We walked down the tunnels of where St. Jerome lived for 20 years translating the Old Testament from Greek to Latin by candlelight.  Our group sat in Jerome's room and sang a hymn together that moved me in a deep way.  I stayed behind during my free time to sit in meditation and prayer.  Tears came as I experienced the Holy Spirit upon me.  I felt a feeling of humbleness and gratefulness as I wept before the Lord.

Next we walked through the courtyard to the church of St. Catherine.  The church was breathtaking and stunning.  I took many photos of the church because I can't even begin to put into words the beauty of the church. 

We then traveled to Herodian where Herod the Great built his summer palace and burial ground.  The structure was massive and we walked up to the top and inside of the palace.  We entered the bath house that has a stone dome which is the oldest dome in the world.  We walked through the tunnels under the palace that was a source for their water with large cisterns that had 25 steps to get to the bottom.  It was amazing and ingenious of what they built during that time.

One of my most favorite times of today was when Janet and I went out on the streets of Bethlehem after dinner to look in the shops.  We only made it to one shop because we talked to a Palestinian shop owner about his experience living under the current conditions.  He said that he lives each day in fear because of the uncertainty of what may or may not happen.  Simple things such as taking his family on vacations or to church is always a hassle.  He only thinks about the day and can't plan anything for the future.  I asked him what his hope was and he said that he hopes things can be different for his children and that things don't get worse then what they currently are. 

As I walked away after having my photo with him, I wondered what is worse?  What is the answer?  There is no war here right now with destruction and devastation, but the Palestinians are losing their land, freedom to do things to come and go as they please and losing power and territory.  I took a picture of the stages of how Israel has been confiscating the Palestinian land.  In 1948 Palestine owned much of the territory.  Now in 2000 Israel owns most of it crowding out the Palestinians.  This injustice makes me angry, but I know anger is not the answer.  How can this feeling be channeled productively to create change in such a complex situation.  The only thing I know to do right now is to pray for peace and justice for the Palestinians.  I also will continue to learn more about the complexity of the situation and see what God may reveal in all of this.  I know God is in control and at the center of this situation even though I question and wonder what the purpose is for all of this despair.  In the meantime, I will remain hopeful for the Palestinians.

Encounters with the Holy Spirit in Jerusalem & Bethlehem

This morning we went to worship at the Melkite Church which is a Greek Orthodox Church in Jerusalem.  The entire service was in Arabic so I didn't understand the language or the service rituals which I enjoyed.  I very much enjoyed their use of chanting, the incense and procession during the service.  Even though I didn't have an understanding, I still felt and experienced the Holy Spirit in an emotional and bodily felt sense way.  As I took communion and went to pray at my seat, that is when I experienced the Holy Spirit in an overwhelming way.  I knew the Spirit was upon me and in my midst but unsure of what was happening to me.

Once we left church, we walked to the Holy Scpulctre Church which is unlike anything I have ever seen before.  Frescos and glass mosaics adorned the walls and ceilings of the massive detailed architecture of stone and marble. 

We then had lunch in the Old City of Jerusalem and shopped local shops.  We then had some free time prior to loading up to Bethlehem in which I ended up taking a nap in the lobby of our guest house.  We then loaded up and were headed to Bethlehem.  We got to experience effortlessly going through the terminal into Bethlehem.  As we passed through, I through how crazy this seemed and wondered if the Palestinians experienced the same effortlessness?  I already knew the answer to that question and seriously doubted it was that easy for them.  As we were driving through Bethlehem, the wall seemed so large and inappropriately placed.  Again I can't even begin to imagine how the Palestinians have suffered, lost their homes, farm land and the injustices of what they have experienced of having so much taken away from them.

Our driver dropped us off at the destination as close to our guest house, The International Center.  We walked the rest of the way because of the narrow streets.  We had time to unpack and freshen up prior to our prayer time and dinner.

Prayer time was again an emotional experience of the Holy Spirit for me.  I wept through hymns, our readings and closing prayer.  I was trembling and knew that I was being called to be still and meditate in the presence of God.  I am so glad that I was obedient and did that because God revealed to me a visual image with a message that I must continue to pray and meditate upon of what God is trying to reveal to me as I am on this Pilgrimage. 

This evening I am exhausted from the events of the day, but mostly from the direct encounters of the Holy Spirit.  Tomorrow we will be touring Manager Square, Church of the Nativity, St. Catherines, Herodian, Solomon's Pools and Shepard's Fields.

Through My Eyes: First Hand Experience of Peace & Conflict

Where do I even begin to discuss and share the events of the day?  I am quickly getting first hand experience of what the Palestinians live each and every day.

This weekend is the Orthodox Christian Easter and there have been celebrations with processionals on the Old City Streets of Jerusalem.  The Israeli's had manned gates everywhere on the borders of the Old City making it difficult to pass through the gates.  If they objected we would wait while our tour guide persuaded them to let us through.

Our first destination was the Greek Orthodox Milkite Church where we were greeted by Archbishop Joseph.  He shared the history of their church and how they became to be in 1724 when the Catholics and Milkites united.  I loved his joyful and loving spirit.  He spoke words of wisdom and stated that "when you become close to Jesus you can get uncomfortable because we must die of all of ourselves to show our love to Jesus.  this is an expression of our conversion and love for Jesus."  He also spoke of how he embraces all and does not judge others in hopes of creating unity and showing Jesus's love.

Father Joseph shared with us the history of the frescos that decorated all of the walls and ceilings.  This particular church was built in 1841 and two Romanian brothers painted the frescos.  He shared the meaning and symbolism of icons of Jesus Christ and Mary & Jesus.  Tomorrow we will be going to their church service.  A quote of wisdom from Father Joseph is that "if we want to become one church, we must sanctify our own heads and mind."


Next we visited St. Mark's Syrian Orthodox Church where Sister Kristine shared numerous miracles.  As we were leaving St. Mark's, this is where we encountered road blocks preventing us from returning the to Old City.  We walked around to numerous gates unable to get back in.  At the New Gate, there was a large crowd and we couldn't even get close to the Israeli police to ask if we could reenter.  As we crossed the street for another plan, that is when things started to get heated with pushing and shoving with loud remarks that I couldn't even begin to understand.  I stood at a distance and observed the injustices and beginning to understand how controversy over land, power, religion and irrational behavior can escalate so quickly into conflict and turmoil. 

I now was a witness to this discriminatory and oppressive behavior.  All I could do was pray for all of those involved and that somehow peace and reconciliation could be achieved in the Holy Land.

To end our day, we visited Tantur which is an ecumenical institute that serves scholars, teachers, students, and spiritual sojourners of all Christian faiths.  We went out onto the roof top with panoramic views of looking back to Jerusalem where we just traveled on Hebron Road.  We also looked out over the West Bank that used to be a grove of trees that is now an Israeli settlement that used to be Palestinian land that was confiscated by the Israelis.  Bethlehem was outlined by the 24 foot Israeli wall with a terminal where Palestinians would have to enter and exit.

As I reflect on everything that I have experienced today,  my heart just goes out to the Palestinian people and I pray that there can be peace in the Holy Land!  Let there be peace and let it begin with me!

Safely in Jerusalem!

I am happy to say that at 5:15 pm all 13 of the 14 are here safely in Jerusalem.  My one classmate missed our flight but I understand that he has made a connecting flight and I hope by now he is here safely. I must say it has been an exhausting trip.  As I was checking in at Dulles Airport, I could only check in one bag to Tel Aviv.  The second bag was all of my toiletry items that they threw away.  This did not dampen my spirits though.  It was simply a lesson learned; don't over pack and bring just one bag:)

The flight from Dulles to Paris was approximately eight hours and at times turbulent.  I took motion sickness medicine and that helped me.  We barely made our connecting flight in Paris to Tel Aviv because our carry on items had to go through security again which did not make much sense to me.  This flight was about an additional seven hours.  During this flight I was able to lie down because I did not have anyone beside me.

Once we arrived at Tel Aviv, I was still feeling the effects of motion sickness and the effects of the motion sickness medicine because it makes me really drowsy.  I had a hard time keeping my eyes open as we were waiting for our bus to pick us up.  Our bus will be taking us to Jerusalem where we will get a panoramic view of the Old City from Mt. Scopus which overlooks the seven Mounts. 

This is all still surreal to me that I am actually here.  I thank God for the great flights, safe travels and a wonderful group of people to travel with.  I am looking forward to what God will reveal to us.  Once we got to Cosa Nova Guest House, we had to walk through windy streets with large limestone structures on each side which seemed to be narrow alley ways.  However, you did have to be careful because cars did drive downs these alley ways.  We walked up several steep flights of stairs to get to Cosa Nova Guest House.  Our room is tiny with two single beds and a small full bath which is just quaint and very clean.  I love it here already!  I am in love with this place and feel a deeply rooted connection that I can't even begin to articulate.  As I rested on my bed prior to going to dinner, you could hear numerous church bells ringing in the background.  I have such a peace and my heart is so full of gratitude and expectancy!

My roommate, Furst, and I left early to walk the streets a bit before our dinner and we were able to watch a processional by the Orthodox Christians celebrating Easter.  There are going to be celebrations here all weekend that were not part of our schedule but we are going to attend some of the special services which I am looking forward to.  As we watched the processional, I became extremely emotional and teary eyed.  I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit that overcame me.  Furst and I heard loud music and drums so we followed the streets to see where it was coming from.  We walked up some steep steps and saw a room full of men and boys playing drums and bag pipes as part of the Easter Celebration.  I spoke with one of the women about their tradition and our souls instantly connected.


I can't even begin to explain this short, but deeply moving experience of being here during the time of Orthodox Christians Easter Celebration.  This is a diverse, complicated but amazing place.  This land is shared predominately by three religions that are in constant turmoil and conflict with each other.   As an outsider looking in, I see people trapped in strongholds from many generations.  I am sensing and feeling a deep, heartfelt connection here at this place of wanting to spread love and peace for all to experience.  Oh God, it is only the first day and I can't wait to see what else you share and reveal to me.  I want to experience more of you God!  I feel like I am at home.  I need to reflect on that and see what that means.  Tomorrow is a packed full day beginning at 6:30 am with added special celebrations that will last until 2 am in the morning if I can stay awake.  I hope I can:)  Peace and blessings to all who are following!  I look forward to sharing more with you of what God reveals.  Love you!